Four Suggestions When Asking for Help
A few weeks ago at the gym, I’m getting into my car when I drop my cell phone. I don’t bend over to get things – that’s not going to end well for me. I saw a lady whom I did not know entering Carilion Wellness Botetourt. I yelled and got her attention and asked for her help. I was nervous about asking a woman I did not know to come over to my car (I didn’t want to make her nervous), so I not only got her attention but yelled and told her precisely what I needed and stepped back a little bit from my phone. She came over, picked up the phone, and handed it to me. I thanked her profusely, and I have never seen her again.
I’m stubborn, and I want to do things for myself. When I’m at the doctor’s office, I do not want to use a wheelchair; I will walk on my own, thank you very much. When we go to a buffet, I really don’t want Tammy going through line and getting my supper. When I’m walking to the car or into church, I really don’t want RJ walking beside me with an arm stretched out to make sure I don’t fall. I like my independence, and I want to do what I can on my own.
However, over the past few years, I’ve had to admit more and more that I cannot do everything I once did. I need to ask for help. Undoubtedly, there are times that you need to ask for help. Here are four suggestions when asking for help:
- Recognize you can’t do everything on your own. I would really like to be Superman and do everything by myself, but I can’t. If you and I could do everything on our own, why would Paul instruct Christians to bear one another’s burdens (Gal 6:2)? Admit that you cannot do everything for yourself and that you will, from time to time, need help.
- Ask the right person to help. Not everyone can help you with everything. Here are some ideas for finding the right person to help:
- Who has offered to help? The most logical people to ask are those who have offered to help. These people wish to help, and we shouldn’t deprive them of the opportunity to serve.
- Who has a servant heart? Whom do you know who is a servant? Whom do you know who enjoys serving? Give such souls the opportunity to follow Jesus and to serve.
- Who has the proper talents/abilities? You don’t want to ask me to help you move furniture. I just can’t. Remember that Jesus told a parable where different people have different talents (Matt 25:14-30). Ask the person with the right talents.You also need to ask someone with the right abilities. When I had a tree fall in my yard, I asked someone with a chainsaw to help. Someone without a chainsaw wouldn’t have the right abilities. Make sure the person you ask can do what you ask.
- Be specific. No one can read your mind. When you ask for help, let the other person know exactly what you need.
- Show gratitude. The Philippian church had contributed to Paul’s mission work, and he wrote the Philippian Epistle to show gratitude. Don’t forget to show gratitude for what others do for you.
Asking for help is not a sign of weakness. Asking for help shows that we recognize our limitations. Asking for help allows others to bear our burdens and thus fulfill the law of Christ (Gal 6:2). Asking for help gives us the opportunity to show gratitude.
Never forget that God is willing to help you as you walk with Him.